Well most of the time, I am a
1.) The tween wanted to wear a tank top and shorts to school
Me: Umm, no you aren't wearing that
Tween: Why, is it cold?
Me: Yea its 40 degrees
Tween: That's not cold, you are just old
Me: Ok, please feel free to turn every shade of blue imaginable, but don't think you are wearing a coat over that pretty pink tank top
Tween: You are so unfair
Me: Yes, I know.
2) The littlest spawn wants to be Superman, of course to acquire superhero status it means you must jump from the railing of the top bunk onto the floor below
Me: DO NOT JUMP OFF OF THAT!
Tiny Spawn: I want to be a stooper hero, I want to be stooper man... I jump
Me: You do NOT jump, you can't be a super hero with a broken neck
Tiny spawn: I promise I won't break my neck and die momma, I'll just break my arm
Me: (stifling giggles) there will be no broken bones tonight, I am too lazy to sit in the ER get down now.
Tiny Spawn: I don't need the ER momma, member I am a stooper hero.
Me: UGH!
3) BEDTIME!
Tween: It's not bedtime
Me: Yes, it is, and don't let your little brother hear you say that
Tween: It isn't bed time for another hour
Me: What part of don't let your brother hear you say "It's not bedtime" did you not understand
Tween: huh?
Tiny Spawn: It's not bedtime! It's not bedtime!
Me: See what you did, I am tired, it's bedtime...
Tween: Huh? (really do aliens take kids brain when they turn 12 or what?)
Tiny Spawn: You said it's not bedtime momma
Me: bedtime
Tween: huh?
Me: Would you just go to bed?!?
Tiny Spawn: Good night momma, I love you so much
Me: Good Night tiny spawn I love you so much too
Tween: huh?
Me: lights out
Tween: OMG! Ugh!
There you have it, three prime examples of why I am the absolute worstest mommy ever. I crush my children's dreams of being blue skinned Eskimos, and stooper heroes, AND I make them go to bed... *gasp* EARLY! What kind of heartless, unfair mom am I? Would it be horrible to admit that tonight I am a bit relieved to have the bad mom award (yes, even though the tween is no longer speaking to me) because it means silence, and today silence is golden. So, I think that I will bask in the glory of my bad mommy award and perhaps even celebrate with a long hot shower, and an early bed time, this time for me.
Think of the horrible things they'll write in the misery memoirs about their dysfunctional mother when they grow up. "She made us dress warmly, and have bedtime." They may never recover.
ReplyDeleteI know, I am horrid! I must admit yesterday was certainly not one of my best days, but I think they will recover and I am nearly certain they will survive : ) Thanks for stopping by.
Deleteoh kids.
ReplyDeletesay and do the darndest things. I'm surprised my son hasn't called me the worstest mom in the world as I never let him jump off of things either.
I'm stopping by and following along via the linkin' with my ladies hop.;)
Maria
www.thislifesbeautifulmoments.com
Ohhhhhhh but Miss Kimbra....Aunt Lettuce remembers when you were a tiny spawn and a tween and you thought your mom was the worstest mom......LOL LOL...sorry I could not resist.~~~Love you!
DeleteMaria, kids do say that darndest things, and last night I was happy to have won the worstest mom award. Thank you for stopping by to visit, I will be visiting and following back very soon! : )
DeleteLisa, I did indeed go through the same phases, I can even remember wearing shorts and tanks when it was super cold outside, but that is part of the reason I know how silly it is to do it LOL!: )
DeleteYour tween and your tiny spawn have the same bedtime? Or were you just so overwhelmed that you just needed it to be bedtime? I'm always trying to figure out what if Emry's bedtime is TOO early... Hmm...
ReplyDeletewww.katerivonstealsnewlife.blogspot.com
I am so glad that we've never had Emry try to jump down off his top bunk... I would die... twice.
My tween and tiny spawn do indeed have the same bedtime. They did not always have the same bedtime, but it made things that much more complicated for me, so they both go to bed at 10pm and are up at 7:30am every morning. Also this is not the tiny spawns first jumping experiment. He was climbing and jumping before he could even walk LOL!
DeleteOMG were you at my house last night? This is exactly how it goes down with us, except, I don't care enough to tell her to wear a jacket, I let her suffer all day!
ReplyDeleteUsually I would let my tween suffer through the day as well, but I guess I was exceptionally mean yesterday and felt an urgent need to hear her whine and complain all the way to school LOL! We are such bad moms how do our kiddos ever make it? LOL kidding of course : )
DeleteIf you are, then I'm the worst! I made my son make his lunch instead of buying it at school and clean up his clothes!
ReplyDeleteWow! We are both terrible, how do these kids ever make it. Just think of the awful things they will tell their therapists about us when they are older LOL! Thank you for stopping by to visit! Have a wonderful day : )
DeleteI can beat you as worstest mom today. I can't get myself to do stuff with them today. Planned on IKEA, shopping, fun stuff, but had a horrible night and "The H" is hitting again, so I'm dragging and let them watch too much TV, make them take quiet time when they are too wound up and force them to have grilled cheese for lunch instead of jelly sandwiches.. Hope to get something half-way decent on their plates tonight..
ReplyDeleteWe all have our bad mom days, sometimes even our best intentions just don't work out and we end up sitting our kids in front of the TV. I am sorry to hear the H is hitting, (is that husband?) if I am incorrect please forgive my assumption, but if not please know you deserve so much better! I hope that your weekend has improved! <3
DeleteI am sorry, I guess that's the fun of being a mom, they hate us just as much as they love us. Sometimes more.
ReplyDelete